5AF Parenting Thread

[robbiestoupe]

Another night of winter soccer, another 10-1 loss, accompanied by a crying 11 year old on the ride home. I’m just disgusted with this season, and would prefer just not showing up to anymore games. But that’s not us, so we’ll continue to suffer.

There’s a team in our basketball league like this. I feel for them. They finally got a win but it’s mostly blowouts

[NTP66]

Another night of winter soccer, another 10-1 loss, accompanied by a crying 11 year old on the ride home. I’m just disgusted with this season, and would prefer just not showing up to anymore games. But that’s not us, so we’ll continue to suffer.

There’s a team in our basketball league like this. I feel for them. They finally got a win but it’s mostly blowouts

The team they lost to last week is a division one team, the best in the league. We have, I think, 8 players on our team in this league, which is 5v5. We play this same team next weekend, but they asked our coach if we could reschedule because they won’t have a full team (they have so many players that they have two teams in the league). They want the reschedule because they’ll only have 10 players.

Get. ****.

As of right now we have not rescheduled, but I already told her coach that this is an insult and we will not be there if they acquiesce.

[mac5155]

My son loves Emily's Wonder Lab. Had it on rotation for months.

She's obviously pregnant in the episodes. Hopefully after her maternity leave she comes back to make season 2

[count2infinity]

I often bemoan the fact that we don’t live close to either set of parents and thus free baby sitting isn’t really a thing, but my favorite aunt growing up does live close. She’s more of a grandmother to my kid than either set of grandparents.

Anyways, she has been asking to have little c2i over for a while now, and we’ve just had illness followed by illness. This weekend: all relatively heathy, and she’s coming to get her at 3, taking her until whenever we’re done with dinner and come get her (8ish).

It’s great timing too, considering I head out for another work trip next weekend.

All this to say: people with free babysitting… cherish that sh*t.

[Nuge]

[shafnutz05]

I often bemoan the fact that we don’t live close to either set of parents and thus free baby sitting isn’t really a thing, but my favorite aunt growing up does live close. She’s more of a grandmother to my kid than either set of grandparents.

Anyways, she has been asking to have little c2i over for a while now, and we’ve just had illness followed by illness. This weekend: all relatively heathy, and she’s coming to get her at 3, taking her until whenever we’re done with dinner and come get her (8ish).

It’s great timing too, considering I head out for another work trip next weekend.

All this to say: people with free babysitting… cherish that sh*t.

I feel that man. We don't really have any babysitting options, I feel like our neighbors' kids spend practically every other weekend at their grandparents house

[CBear3]

Another night of winter soccer, another 10-1 loss, accompanied by a crying 11 year old on the ride home. I’m just disgusted with this season, and would prefer just not showing up to anymore games. But that’s not us, so we’ll continue to suffer.

There’s a team in our basketball league like this. I feel for them. They finally got a win but it’s mostly blowouts

The team they lost to last week is a division one team, the best in the league. We have, I think, 8 players on our team in this league, which is 5v5. We play this same team next weekend, but they asked our coach if we could reschedule because they won’t have a full team (they have so many players that they have two teams in the league). They want the reschedule because they’ll only have 10 players.

Get. ****.

As of right now we have not rescheduled, but I already told her coach that this is an insult and we will not be there if they acquiesce.

Our parks and rec's league is setup so you get to pick 1 friend your kid to be on the team with. But you can also pick your assistant coach separately. So by rule you can basically draft or retain 4 players. But, presumably because its hard to get coaches, the director of the department will let coaches who coach every sport to usually pick another 2 people. So our 10 person flag football team had 8 returning players from the previous year (the coaches' kids both played up a grade and they guilted the director in letting them pick a few extras). They've lost 1 game over two and a half years. So there were some terrible butt-kickings dished out, but the coaches would bench people based on attitude so the kids were pretty respectful about it.

Fast forward to basketball season, and they got the last year of elementary combined with first year of middle school kids. There's a team much like our flag team, made up of mostly of middle schoolers, who'd played together for years. I knew we'd get walloped by 20+, no shame in recognizing that you're not where another group is yet. But the chanting air ball from the bench, the standing over guys when they got knocked down, the press late in the game when they were up 20, the smack talk, whomp-whomp at any turnover was the most class-less thing I've seen in something like 40 different youth sports seasons.

I told the boys that come 8th grade when they can play for their middle school teams, be prepared for that physicality and intensity. But don't ever behave like that. Nobody on our team quit, and they didn't get sucked into the BS. I let them and their parents know how proud I was of them. It was like we were filming a sportsmanship video and they were on the good example side. I know there were some tears on the car rides home, but I'm more proud of how they handled that than any of the wins this year.

[DigitalGypsy66]

And they wonder why youth participation in sports is in decline...

It's one thing to have a kid act like that during a game. It's another to have a coach openly ENCOURAGE it. We ran into that with a soccer team in the Charlotte area. Some sort of IMG academy lite program, where the coach never let his team let up on my son's team. I think the final was 25-0 or something. One of the kids was talking to my son and his teammate during a stoppage and he actually felt bad (one of the few with a conscience) but said the coaches wanted them to keep scoring. Just really awful.

[Orlando Penguin]

As usual, the adults ruin it for the kids. Good on ya, Bear, for being on the right side of it and teaching them how to handle it.

[NTP66]

Good on you, CB.

[Morkle]

My son has been in early intervention since he was like 3 months old. We're preparing for kindergarten meeting, but he's got ADHD and a genetic condition which is impacting his learning.

But therapy has improved and done so much for our son, it's wild. We've been in therapy two nights a week for 5+ years, and I wouldn't really have it any other way to have the free help.

How do they know a 3 month old needs early intervention?

He was born with a genetic condition (that was discovered through years of testing, and was originally found because he had Hypotonia) that required(s) a form of OT, PT, Speech, etc.

He's been getting assistance since mo. 3 when they diagnosed his muscle joints feeling loose, and they have never said we'd need to stop any time soon as it's doing nothing but positive for him. So, early intervention and the service before it has always been a thing in our household.

[NTP66]

I owe a lot to early intervention. Our original pediatricians were incompetent, and it took a PT from early intervention noticing my daughter's head tilt while visiting another child at school and letting us know to get it checked out. Went back to the pediatrician to discuss and they were like, 'oh yeah, she does have torticollis and plagiocephaly'. Thanks, you **** Canaans.

Saw a new pediatrician that same week, and not only did they also confirm that, but they also noticed uneven leg sizes (or something like that) and told us to take her for xrays on her hip. Sure enough, she had hip dysplasia. Thankfully, we caught it all early, and she was in a spica cast for 3+ months, and also had to wear a helmet for a while. Fast forward 10+ years later, and she's got one more hip appointment to go where she should be given the all-clear for the issue. Almost makes me sick to think that there was a chance she'd have required hip surgery in her teens if it was not corrected when it was.

All thanks to having a pediatrician who actually does their job. We love the practice, and feel very lucky that they're here.

[CBear3]

I owe a lot to early intervention. Our original pediatricians were incompetent, and it took a PT from early intervention noticing my daughter's head tilt while visiting another child at school and letting us know to get it checked out. Went back to the pediatrician to discuss and they were like, 'oh yeah, she does have torticollis and plagiocephaly'. Thanks, you **** Canaans.

Saw a new pediatrician that same week, and not only did they also confirm that, but they also noticed uneven leg sizes (or something like that) and told us to take her for xrays on her hip. Sure enough, she had hip dysplasia. Thankfully, we caught it all early, and she was in a spica cast for 3+ months, and also had to wear a helmet for a while. Fast forward 10+ years later, and she's got one more hip appointment to go where she should be given the all-clear for the issue. Almost makes me sick to think that there was a chance she'd have required hip surgery in her teens if it was not corrected when it was.

All thanks to having a pediatrician who actually does their job. We love the practice, and feel very lucky that they're here.

We have this discussion every other month here in the engineering office when dodinting about how worthless some other engineers can be. Every profession has people barely skating by and doing the minimum, so don't be impressed when somebody says they're a doctor because somebody had to graduate last in their class.

[Morkle]

I owe a lot to early intervention. Our original pediatricians were incompetent, and it took a PT from early intervention noticing my daughter's head tilt while visiting another child at school and letting us know to get it checked out. Went back to the pediatrician to discuss and they were like, 'oh yeah, she does have torticollis and plagiocephaly'. Thanks, you **** Canaans.

Saw a new pediatrician that same week, and not only did they also confirm that, but they also noticed uneven leg sizes (or something like that) and told us to take her for xrays on her hip. Sure enough, she had hip dysplasia. Thankfully, we caught it all early, and she was in a spica cast for 3+ months, and also had to wear a helmet for a while. Fast forward 10+ years later, and she's got one more hip appointment to go where she should be given the all-clear for the issue. Almost makes me sick to think that there was a chance she'd have required hip surgery in her teens if it was not corrected when it was.

All thanks to having a pediatrician who actually does their job. We love the practice, and feel very lucky that they're here.

I’ve got a long drawn out story of our whole ordeal, it wasn’t our doctor that cared. Much like yours, he was an idiot in the sense he’s good for normal kids and he was poor in diagnosing unclear issues.


Our PA at his office tripped off the hypotonia alarms and it’s been a blessing. There are kids who have the issue and aren’t seen until much later and are years behind.

More Jr. is like a year behind at 5 given all things considered and we’ll take that any day of the week.

[Morkle]

Trying to sign our son up for kindergarten wrap services - and they were registered/full before we even had a chance to do it this AM. Worse than trying to buy taylor swift tickets, and now we're scrambling to get support because we're on a wait list.

My wife is melting down because North Allegheny offers absolutely dick support when it comes to Kindergarten.

[MR25]

FWIW, despite graduating from NA, my parents sent me to St Sebastian (I think Holy Cross or something now?) for kindergarten because it was one of the few places that offered full day. I'm fairly positive NA is still only half day.

[dodint]

I didn't even know half-day kindergarten was a thing until I moved to PA. In NC we just had, you know, kindergarten.

[Morkle]

NA is half day, and that's the problem. They won't do back and forth bus rides, only one home if you're in the afternoon or in the morning if you're in the morning.

So that means my wife and I currently will have to figure out a solution on drop off in the middle of the day. So frustrating for working parents.

[Pavel Bure]

Good on you, CB.

Agreed. Rec sports aren’t even fun anymore due to the team stacking. It happens everywhere. We did baseball for a bit and the coaches would have a “draft” before the season. One team always ended up with the kids that were more experienced and played together for years and the other teams were left to flounder. By 4th grade most kids that weren’t with the “in” crowd quit. The same happens in basketball and soccer. A big part is the ego of parents and coaches. The focus isn’t even fun anymore, it’s winning, and you better have your kid doing camps and clubs from early elementary on or they’ll be left behind. It’s really gross and sad.

Oddly enough wrestling has some of those factors but the coaches and parents are for the most part pretty good in realizing that kids have different levels and learn at different paces. The sport seems to be focused on working hard and not giving up with winning coming in as a factor much later. You still have clubs and skill gaps but there’s no stacking one team due to the individual nature and skill level restrictions of meets and tournaments.

[CBear3]

Good on you, CB.

Agreed. Rec sports aren’t even fun anymore due to the team stacking. It happens everywhere. We did baseball for a bit and the coaches would have a “draft” before the season. One team always ended up with the kids that were more experienced and played together for years and the other teams were left to flounder. By 4th grade most kids that weren’t with the “in” crowd quit. The same happens in basketball and soccer. A big part is the ego of parents and coaches. The focus isn’t even fun anymore, it’s winning, and you better have your kid doing camps and clubs from early elementary on or they’ll be left behind. It’s really gross and sad.

Oddly enough wrestling has some of those factors but the coaches and parents are for the most part pretty good in realizing that kids have different levels and learn at different paces. The sport seems to be focused on working hard and not giving up with winning coming in as a factor much later. You still have clubs and skill gaps but there’s no stacking one team due to the individual nature and skill level restrictions of meets and tournaments.

I wonder if weight classes help with that?

Also, I'm going to try to teach them triangle and 2 tomorrow with a big 14 foot elastic band. At the worst it should be good for some laughs. Wish me luck.

[Pavel Bure]

Good on you, CB.

Agreed. Rec sports aren’t even fun anymore due to the team stacking. It happens everywhere. We did baseball for a bit and the coaches would have a “draft” before the season. One team always ended up with the kids that were more experienced and played together for years and the other teams were left to flounder. By 4th grade most kids that weren’t with the “in” crowd quit. The same happens in basketball and soccer. A big part is the ego of parents and coaches. The focus isn’t even fun anymore, it’s winning, and you better have your kid doing camps and clubs from early elementary on or they’ll be left behind. It’s really gross and sad.

Oddly enough wrestling has some of those factors but the coaches and parents are for the most part pretty good in realizing that kids have different levels and learn at different paces. The sport seems to be focused on working hard and not giving up with winning coming in as a factor much later. You still have clubs and skill gaps but there’s no stacking one team due to the individual nature and skill level restrictions of meets and tournaments.

I wonder if weight classes help with that?

Also, I'm going to try to teach them triangle and 2 tomorrow with a big 14 foot elastic band. At the worst it should be good for some laughs. Wish me luck.

Weight classes help. Experience restrictions help as well. We’ve been to “open” tournaments and watched the skill range from kids just smashing others to beginners all grouped in the same weight class. Then there are others like the one we went to yesterday. It was for 1st and 2nd year wrestlers only. The kids were evenly matched all the way through for the most part.

[DigitalGypsy66]

Good to see the little team stacking isn't a regional thing.

That happened to us for several years, until my younger son demonstrated he could play baseball pretty well...then we got on mediocre teams (rather than awful teams).

[Morkle]

Parents absolutely ruin youth sports, and it's 100% the reason why I quit coaching early on.

[NTP66]

Source of the post Rec sports aren’t even fun anymore due to the team stacking.

The township next to ours apparently did this. Snatched all of the top talent for their one team, so the other few teams were left with the rest. That team basically wins every tournament they're a part of. Last year, they did lose the final in the same tournament our team was in, and I was delighted to hear it. Lost to a team two divisions below them, too.

[count2infinity]

Registered the kid for spring soccer today. I told her a while back that it was an option and she seemed excited. I double checked with her last night...

"Do you want to play on a soccer team this year?"

"YEAHHH!!!!"

"And do you want to play on the team because daddy loves soccer, or because you want to play soccer?"

"I want to play. I love soccer."

Alright... let's give it a go!